They didn’t even bother to use the ‘Jesus Saves’ bit.

Monday 14 June 2010

I haven’t been blogging for a bit because things got a bit hectic lately, including having to look for a new home yet again; so it was nice to come back from work tonight to see this helpful bit of guidance shoved though the letter slot.

See what they did there? They’re talking about football ‘cos the World Cup’s on. On reflection, it’s kind of sad how low god has sunk these days. Centuries ago he inspired cathedrals and masterpieces of art; now he struggles to inspire in his followers the most trite and muddled analogies:

On the Spiritual field – Jesus is the referee, the world is the pitch and the first YELLOW CARD is a WARNING to you to prepare to meet God. The second YELLOW CARD is your FINAL WARNING; = A RED CARD and you are SENT OFF forever to that place the Bible calls HELL.

When the final whistle blows on your life make sure you are on the winning side!

It’s a goal!!

It might have helped if they got someone who actually understands the rules of football to write their little pamphlet, or at least someone who knows enough about the sport to not compare Jesus to the most hated person on the field.

Of course, the contact address is in Northern Ireland, the Queensland of Great Britain.

Also, this and this.