{"id":79,"date":"2004-12-07T00:18:00","date_gmt":"2004-12-07T00:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/wordpress\/?p=79"},"modified":"2009-12-31T17:24:24","modified_gmt":"2009-12-31T17:24:24","slug":"hokey-local-news-and-the-two-minute-hate","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/2004\/12\/hokey-local-news-and-the-two-minute-hate.html","title":{"rendered":"Hokey Local News and the Two Minute Hate"},"content":{"rendered":"
I must have slept in because the newspapers have already reverted to publishing blatant crap<\/a> for the summer:<\/div>\n
\n
A residential island could be built in Port Phillip Bay, made of silt from the proposed dredging of the bay and the Yarra River.<\/div>\n<\/blockquote>\n
In a related news story, a 500-room luxury palace could<\/em> be built in my back yard, made of solid gold panned and smelted by my personal harem of nubile virgins. <\/div>\n
\n

Melbourne 2030 reference group member Rob Pradolin said Melbourne needed visionary projects such as this.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n

Thanks for your support, Rob. <\/div>\n
The article even provides this challenging vision of the future below, with a provocative question. Mouse over the picture for the secret answer.<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
To save you the trouble of reading hacks scratching their balls in The Age<\/em><\/a> for the next two months, I will now predict the summer’s top ‘news’ stories so you can put in more quality time falling asleep on the couch in front of the cricket on telly: <\/div>\n
\u2022 A scientist will claim to have cloned the mountain lion in the Dandenongs, which will boost the revival of the local film industry. <\/div>\n
\u2022 A environmentally-friendly world-class luxury hotel will be built on the CUB Brewery site, which developers predict will become an international tourist attraction. <\/div>\n
\u2022 A (feature in the Good Weekend\/column by Tony Parkinson<\/a>) which explains why everyone in the world, yourself included (is obsessed with\/will be grateful for) the (boundless talent and charismatic mystique\/noble statesmanship) of (Casey Donovan<\/a>\/Donald Rumsfeld<\/a>). <\/div>\n
\u2022 An article by John Elder where he wanders the streets picking up other people’s litter. At first he has some difficulty find enough litter, but soon gets the hang of it. After a while tries to interview passersby about his litter-gathering, but finds everyone is strangely reluctant to talk to him. <\/div>\n
\u2022 An opinion essay by a staff writer who has the epiphany that she prefers some cafes over others, but explains this phenomenon by tenuously blaming it on other people’s moral failings and interpreting it as a sign of modern society’s decline. Hang on, they’ve done that one already<\/a>.<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I must have slept in because the newspapers have already reverted to publishing blatant crap for the summer: A residential island could be built in Port Phillip Bay, made of silt from the proposed dredging of the bay and the Yarra River. In a related news story, a 500-room luxury palace could be built in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,10],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=79"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2388,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79\/revisions\/2388"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=79"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=79"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cookylamoo.com\/boringlikeadrill\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=79"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}